


Thoughts on The Rise of Skywalker.

by JamieB93



Series: The Stark Boys Saga [3]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: F/M, Harley Keener & Peter Parker Friendship, Harley Keener & Peter Parker are Siblings, Harley Keener is Tony Stark's Adopted Child, Harley Keener is a Good Bro, Tony Stark Acting as Harley Keener's Parental Figure, Tony Stark Acting as Peter Parker's Parental Figure
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-23
Updated: 2019-12-23
Packaged: 2021-02-18 03:11:09
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,256
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21920857
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JamieB93/pseuds/JamieB93
Summary: “You did challenge the CEO of Disney to a fight” Harley laughed, “And now people are saying that he and Tony are feuding because of it.”“Shit” Peter replied, “D’you think this means I’m not going to be allowed to be in anymore Disney movies? What will I do with my days?”“You could sign a multi-picture deal with Sony?”“Ewww, gross” Peter spat his tongue out
Relationships: Harley Keener & Peter Parker, Harley Keener & Peter Parker & Tony Stark, Harley Keener & Tony Stark, Peter Parker & Tony Stark
Series: The Stark Boys Saga [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1540735
Comments: 3
Kudos: 111





	Thoughts on The Rise of Skywalker.

**Author's Note:**

> Spoilers for Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker ahead!
> 
> Enjoy two nerdy boys bickering.

**Thoughts on The Rise of Skywalker.**

The benefit of being the semi-famous in your own right adoptive son of the world’s most famous power couple brought a lot of problems, in Harley’s opinion. Lack of privacy was one thing. It seemed like he could no longer set foot outside of the tower without having to deal with someone demanding his attention, usually tween girls who made Lila Barton’s excitement over his presence seem tame by comparison. 

Peter hated it too, they’d bonded over a lot of things but mutual hatred of having the world’s attention on them at all times now seemed to be the bigger one. It wasn’t even like Tony and Pepper were allowing them to embrace the fun side of being famous all that much. They’d been made to turn down interviews on Ellen, Fallon and Kelly Clarkson’s talk show (Harley didn’t care all that much about Fallon but he and Peter were devastated over Kelly Clarkson) and it had been a big resounding ‘no’ to Wired Autocomplete and Buzzfeed’s Thirst Tweets offers as well. 

There was, however, one thing Harley was genuinely enjoying about being well known: people suddenly seemed to care about what he had to say….about anything. His Twitter account had always been his outlet for sharing whatever random opinions about whatever random pop culture he’d been indulging himself in that week and historically, no one gave a shit. Not even his friends could pretend like they were interested on his Wonder Woman hot takes and even Peter seemed to tire of his constant rants about how Ed Sheeran had once had such promise as a songwriter and had blown it all for the sake of radio friendly commercial fodder. 

Then, he got famous.

And people cared. They retweeted. They replied. They encouraged him to do it more, some asked him to put his sprawling thoughts into video formats and he happily complied. Harley Keener-Stark’s YouTube channel focused mainly on him reviewing whatever newly released blockbusters he’d seen (another benefit of being well known was early access to press screenings of whatever films he and Peter wanted to see) and he sprinkled in some good old-fashioned family style vlogs for good measure, naturally.

In three months, Harley had amassed ten million YouTube subscribes and had yet to have a video fail to reach at least two million views. For all the genuine effort he was putting into his review videos, it did slightly chap Harley’s ass that his most popular video was Peter challenging him to a dance battle which ended in humiliation for Harley when it turned out Peter was, in fact, a highly skilled natural dancer and totally shamed him. 

Harley had always assumed Peter’s fluid movements were affects of his genetic spider mutation bite but nope….it turned out, annoyingly, Peter could just do that. 

The video had gained thirteen million views in six weeks and Peter was very, very smug about it. It did, however, open Peter’s eyes to the world of YouTube and whilst he wasn’t totally comfortable building his own channel yet he was becoming increasingly willing to jump on to Harley’s whenever he had the chance, often providing his (in Harley’s opinion much less nuanced) hot takes on whatever Harley was reviewing that week. 

This particular week was Harley’s most anticipated video ever.

Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker was out and it was well known on the Internet sphere that both teenaged Stark sons were huge Star Wars nerds and everyone seemed on bated breath waiting for them to upload their thoughts on the movie.

Tony warned Harley there was a chance if he posted a bad review, there was a genuine fear he could somewhat tank Disney’s quarterly profits. For Harley, that was merely an incentive.

*

“So, Pete, what were your thoughts on this movie?” Harley asked with a smirk in front of the video camera the next morning at 3.30am, the boys having attended a midnight screening with Ned, MJ and Bruce. All three had gone to bed like ‘normal people’ after but the boys had decided they needed to get their immediate thoughts on film. 

Peter had hated the movie. 

Harley had quite liked it. 

“Well, first of all, they did my girl Kelly Marie Train dirty!” Peter grumbled, “Rose deserved more screen time and that’s just facts.”

“I mean, I didn’t really even notice her” Harley shrugged, “I much preferred seeing Rey, Finn and Poe together just the three of them and the bots. That’s what we were promised, and it’s just a shame it took them four years to deliver on it. Stupid Last Jedi.”

“Yeah, I did feel like those parts were the best parts of the film” Peter agreed, “You know that I have my really strange connection to Daisy Ridley, right? Like I just feel like I know her somehow, it’s weird, and she brought her A-game here. She was great. All three of them were, actually.”

“Finn/Poe rights?” Harley asked.

“Of fucking course” Peter replied emphatically, “They are gay. They are in love. They are boyfriends and Disney are big, fat dirty cowards.”

“Dude, Bob Iger is literally going to be in our living room for the Christmas Eve party in like three days” Harley reminded him with a smirk.

“Good, and I’ll tell him to his face” Peter laughed, “Probably might need to be a little drunk before I do it though, Bob Iger’s not a man I can have a sober conversation with.”

“Dad, we promise we won’t drink” Harley addressed the camera directly, “Anyway, I have to say, overall I enjoyed this movie and I felt it righted a lot of the wrongs from the last one.”

“Yeah, by creating new ones!” Peter exclaimed, “Rey’s parentage? I think I genuinely preferred it when they made us believe her parents were just drunks who left her. This shit was dumb, even if I have to admit I got a little fanboy-ish when the Emperor did his lightning thing.”

“That was sick” Harley agreed, “I didn’t really mind the Rey twist. I think my biggest issue with the movie, as is always the case with these sequels, is professional sad boy Kyle Ren. Big respect to my man Adam Driver but boy….that guy. Yeesh.”

“Oh yeah, we forgot to say” Peter said with a sly smile, “Harley hates nuanced, well fleshed out characters who are played by the greatest actors of their generation. Just hates them. But Kylo is a bit creepy so maybe you’re valid, I dunno.”

Harley rolled his eyes.

“Oh whatever, Mr. The Joker-Was-Overrated” he said. Peter’s jaw hung open.

“I cannot believe you’re throwing that in my face right now” Peter replied, “I have perfectly valid reasons not to like that movie.”

“Oh, do share” Harley teased him.

Peter paused for a moment.

“Clowns are creepy” he muttered.

“And there we have it, folks” Harley said, his eyes flaring with the dangerous charisma that had made half the world fall utterly in love with him over the last few months, “Anyway, it’s like three in the morning and we have a toddler and a newborn in this place so we’ll sign off for now. I’m gonna get my thoughts down on paper and then do a video proper cos there’s a lot to think about with this movie-“

“-C3PO was really funny, I guess” Peter interjected. He yawned and smiled as rested his head on Harley’s shoulder, “But my favourite part of this entire experience was sitting with my brother, my best friend, my amazing girlfriend, the Hulk and nerdy press dudes. Such great company.”

“You know it” Harley said with a wink, patting Peter’s cheek as the boy yawned, “Any other thoughts? About anything?”

“Daisy Ridley, if you’re out there, tell me if you get the feeling we knew one another in a previous life” Peter yawned, “It’s uncanny. I kinda feel like we were in a jungle or something? Hit me up.”

“Yeah…..anyway, I’m gonna do a full video tomorrow when this one’s busy” Harley continued with a laugh. Peter frowned.

“When am I going to be busy?” he asked, “Even more so, when am I going to busy and away from you? If I’m busy, you need to be busy too. It’s only fair.”

“You’re doing that thing” Harley muttered.

“What thing?” Peter asked. Harley rolled his eyes again.

“You know….with…” he went on

“Oh!” Peter exclaimed, “Oh, that. No, I’m not doing that anymore it’s been cancelled, Clint still has groin strain.”

Harley laughed out loud.

“I’m sure he’s going to be thrilled you shared that with the Internet!” he wheezed as Peter caught up to what he’d just said and laughed along. Of course, Harley knew he could just edit Peter’s comments about Clint out, but where would the fun be in that?

“So, marks out of ten?” Peter asked, “I’m giving it a solid six. Entertaining, not totally without value, but boy were them some choices made I don’t agree with. Better than The Last Jedi….Harls?”

“I’ll give it like a seven point five, maybe an eight” Harley said thoughtfully, “It was good, well-paced, I’m not crazy about the ending or the parentage twists but I feel like they were backed into a corner and did the best they could. Anyway, full video coming tomorrow and then the day after that….we’re seeing Cats!”

“What could go wrong?” Peter asked sardonically as Harley pushed him over and switched the camera off.

*

Peter was awoken the next morning, well afternoon, by Harley crashing into his bed with his laptop on his knee and excitedly announcing; “We’ve broken the Internet again!”

Peter sat up in bed and removed some of the sleep from his eye. He squinted as he looked down at the video of their Star Wars review playing on Harley’s laptop and was shocked to see that in the space of just ten hours they’d hit six million views.

“You know what this means?!” Harley asked excitedly, “That dumb video of you out dancing me has only a few days until it stops being the most watched video on my channel. If the video keeps getting viewed at this rate for the next twenty-four hours, it’ll hit ten million by tomorrow morning and then over thirteen by Friday. How awesome is that?”

“Very awesome” Peter yawned, “Have we upset anyone with our edgy opinions though?”

“You’re catching some flack for being a Kylo fanboy” Harley informed him with a smile, “Tumblr is not very happy with you.”

“Tumblr can suck my dick” Peter moaned.

“Most of them want to, I think that’s why they’re upset” Harley said with a shrug, “Just kidding, you’re fine, everyone loves you. As usual.”

“They love us” Peter corrected him, “We’re bringing the world together in these dark, dark times.”

“You did challenge the CEO of Disney to a fight” Harley laughed, “And now people are saying that he and Tony are feuding because of it.”

“Shit” Peter replied, “D’you think this means I’m not going to be allowed to be in anymore Disney movies? What will I do with my days?”

“You could sign a multi-picture deal with Sony?”

“Ewww, gross” Peter spat his tongue out, “Does Tony know I challenged the CEO of the world’s biggest multimedia conglomerate to a fight yet?”

“No, but it’s only a matter of time” Harley replied, “It is trending.”

“Never let me film when I’m that tired again” Peter yawned, snuggling into Harley’s side, “Bitchy 3am Peter should not be exposed to the Internet.”

“Bitchy 3am Peter has brought me my biggest engagement yet” Harley replied, “I will be exploiting him regularly from now on.”

“You really like all this YouTube stuff, don’t you?” Peter asked with a smile, “I mean, obviously you must or you wouldn’t do it, but you….this really actually means something to you, doesn’t it?”

“Well, you spend your whole childhood getting told to shut up whenever you tried to speak about anything or share your thoughts” Harley replied, “When people then actually start wanting to hear what you think about stuff, it feels nice.”

“Happy Harley” Peter yawned once again, “I love Happy Harley. He’s my favourite Harley. He should visit more often.”

“He’s trying” Harley said with a smile. They sat back together for a while and watched some compilations of their various family members falling over on missions they’d been filmed doing, until Tony’s head appeared in Peter’s bedroom looking angry.

“If you’re going to pick a fight with powerful CEO’s Parker, can it at least be Bezos or Musk?” he asked, “I have to spend the rest of Christmas Eve-Eve sweet talking Bob on the phone now. Well played. Also, Clint’s mad you told the whole Internet he has groin strain.”

“And how do you feel about that?” Peter asked

“Well, let’s just say if you hadn’t done that, your ass would’ve been grounded until the New Year” Tony said with a shrug, “Pepper says that’s unconventional parenting, but hey ho. I won the coin toss.”

“We’re being raised on coin tosses?” Harley asked, turning on a Kelly Clarkson song to be petty and passive aggressive. It was _Mr. Know It All_. 

“Of course” Tony said matter-of-factly, rolling his eyes as Kelly Clarkson's chorus hit, “How else does one parent?”

Harley and Peter both laughed as Tony blew them a kiss and went on his way. 

Life honestly felt pretty good right now. 

**Author's Note:**

> Yes, I managed to make a dumb YouTube AU story soft and gooey at the end. Yay me.


End file.
